wooo.. internship finally end. my life can finally slow down alittle. actually when it end i actually quite happy, not because of lesser work, is because i feel that i have achieve and learnt really alot. eventhough my internship is somehow sometime stress but then when i think about it' atleast i learn more than other people. to be honest, i actually only feel that i only overwork myself once is when my colleague call me come at 830 and work till 8 pm with out breadfast( cause too rush. hahas) and lunch and dinner. that time is really.. WA... you know. cause i always feel, even if she dont agree with the same theory, she could atleast help, and not ignore, no matter what we are still same team and my boss colleague also agree with my logic cause my boss is on leave. and i did check the net that broth diffusion peameate will remain the same colour as the feed. but oo well... amazing i am not angry, i was just thinking maybe is a good chance to prove her, but she wouldnt listen. that why now i everything also call my boss to ask her, hahs! is also that time i realise that i can actually plan in my head in second. wow. i am really amaze by myself, cause she also never teach me how to do, just tell me need to do and walk off. is not i dont want to tell her to help me or tell my boss, is because i was thinking if i was her and people ignore my theory and carry on do and i was very confidence how would i react?hahas, and what for soil the relationship. and she really help me alot that why i cant really complain, must accept the way she is. hahas And sometime i automatically compare with other people, why other no need stay as late as me, but then i always feel is ok. cause i am really learning alot more. really alot. and i mean hands on. cause reading wise, i weekend also have to think how to improve my protocol, research and think. so confirm more then them, eventhough tired i am happy that i everyday dont have to do the same thing over and over again, atleast i get to analyse my own experiment. most important die or late also must eat breadfast, to prevent same senerio. sometime is not because i am late, is because i know if i come early, i also cant get to do my work, cause the place or equipment is being use, and i know around what timei can use.
to sum up what i learn: patience is the best flower in the garden of life! plan up to work/second. adapt to myself to other people fellings. think while doing. ( cause i would normally think and plan the rush through the work!) hahas. believe my boss hehe. and lastly is to plan my work really really well.
but i realise i really hate one thing. those people that dont know anything and just comment and comment is really irritating. so i just do and dont bother explaining to them, they are serious not asking they are like commenting. ooo well... work life. what to do.
not matter what, if i were to grade my internship. i will grade 9.5/10 cause i really got a good boss and co-boss (even though she sometime really... and she is oinh oinh)(her leadership skills also... torture me. ba!)but she is still great, and i really learn alot about science and myself. i believe i did my best, right mce. ;) ! yeah eventhough my co-boss is suppose to help me in my project, i believe i did my best to finish up most of my work on the day not matter how late so that my boss wont ask her help to do and complete. cause i thought she is really busy with her stuff.(true or not i really dont know, cause i always think if she's free she will come to help me asking). lastly thanks the people who had helped me in my internship, and is fun having fun colleague around. not all but most. =) the end

die. mce going to have the fever feeling.... eeeee...... i hate the feel

compete for revenge isn't what i want to do. just to tell you. =) that doesnt mean i am free for feed

for some reason i just can't stop laughing how stupid i am... ... hahs! need to learn management skills. many many more!

i miss, and really miss

hmm.. seems to be so long since i have such a peaceful smile in my heart. the wind seems to be gushing to my mind, the sound of the rain drop seems to match so nicely with the classical music i am listening and the tingling feeling of the rain droping on me really make me feel like i am still in the past living everyday with so much joy and happiness. it really put my heart at ease, smiling through the rain and set me thinking calmly. the touch of the rain drop feel so refreshing and the gushing and howling of the wind seems to be telling me: dont worry... i will come again if you ever need me again. before i went up my house, i said: thank you, thank you for letting me feel at peace and let me realise everything will end, just how fast and soon it will be. lastly i say thank you for leting me remember everything will change but some things will remain in my soul though time and just wait, what meant to be back will be back, for at least I(mother nature) will be there again if you really meet with challenging endeavours again. the smile that i lost so long ago....

if is misunderstanding i still can understand barely, like my past sec school mates, but my heart wont let it pass. however, this time is out of fun, really dont know how to let it down. mce dont want to go to violent path again and vulgar again but... ... i really cant believe someone can actually stop my childishness which i created and make me so serious. or does it just means that is time for me to grow up. is really amazing

there a reason why i am childish and i dont want to get serious. haiz. my life have offically beocme complicted again. i guess i am used to a few month of peaceful life but the fire line have started sparkle again.

i not sure how long has it been since i felt so much negative opinion about one person. i am not even sure if i have this much negative thought about one person before. if u read what i have type, try to talk to me about work and nothing else. just in case i could not hold my temper towards you. this time you really gone overboard.

From now on I will only treat you as a colleague and wont placed any more trust. In the matter of fact I never place trust in people and I am only trying out slowly to be open. I believe in you so I told you a little more about myself than the other and yet I can’t believe you still can play when my family is in concern. As what Binoy as said I should take responsibility in what I do and is my fault in the first place that risk using someone handphone to send the sms. If not u won’t even have a chance to play. From now on I will resume my secondary school forge policy. Anti-trust policy which I set to myself. Sorry, this time round I can’t take any more risk. I am already in a stormy ride with my family now u have successful put it in a tsunami crisis. And I just realize, the more close I am to a person the more harm I will get. Same to the secondary friend which I am close to. Which sparkle the stormy ride in my life. And seriously, I really don’t know other words to use other than the f word. Cause this is F insane. I hope just I won’t use the word hate again. Which I have a extremely bad experiences using the word once to a person i treasure alot in my sec life.

mce wont lead people now. cause i know i still have much to learn and culture before i can bring people to greater heights. but i will lead those willing to follow and believe in the same destination.

u know what make me sad? is when i cant make the people i want happy and not possible to see the person smile.

actually i wanted to go wu shu, i have prepared all my equipment but then my heart devoid me the courage of going. maybe i realise now why people shouldn't know too much of you

if your heart isn't happy, this prove that u shouldn't give up. but then... will tears pour if carry on? will the out come be detrimental? actually the main thing is will i be able to overcome the heart burden or obstacle? i have experience one sem of intense heart trama, that why i understand i am not as good as i know i am.